i deliver my deadly speech
Thursday, December 31, 2009
I am really scare, because 2010 is coming in several hours from now. I am always sad at the last day of a year. Because I don't know what will happen to me in a new year.
Why do I always have to tolerate all those pain that I am suffering? I ask god why but I always don't have any answer. What wrong had I done to deserve it. In my past life???
I wonder if everyone had forgotten me already? I doubt you all remember. Next time when you all see me please don't ask me how's with my life. Now I will tell you : I AM NOT FINE AT ALL!!!
With all those fears that keeps on circulating in my brain how good can I be? Keep on having different kinds of strange dreams. I think I have lost my sanity.
And something more worst is that now I still don't have confidence to go school. What's wrong with me?? It's gonna be 1-1-10 soon yet I am still like this. I really have no confidence to continue to live on with my damn life. Don't worry if I were to die I will go peacefully without disturbing anyone. Jumping down from high buildings and purposely get into an accident is stupid because my face will be disfigured so I won't do this two act. Even if I were to commit suicide I want to die 'beautifully' though I know I am ugly.
I will update soon again, I will upload those "blogs" I wrote in my microsoft in my mobile.
died off at: 11:33 AM;
